Stories about Assumptions - "You know you are getting older when........"

It is very common for us to make assumptions. Sometimes when we look at a person who is dressed shabbily, we would assume that the person could not afford to buy nice clothes  or if the person is quiet, we would assume that the person has not much to say. Well, those are just merely assumptions. We are just making our own conclusion by seeing what is on the surface. However, sometimes when we dig deeper or go further, we will realise that our assumptions may not be correct. So, how do we avoid making assumptions? Well, by creating rapport and asking questions. We should ask enough questions to make an informed impression of the person.

Let me share with you two amusing stories that happened to me recently. Both stories have a common theme.....”You know when you are getting older”

Story No. 1: The Waitress and the glass of water

One day, I was having lunch with a few friends who were much younger than me. After taking our orders, the waitress proceeded to get us some water. All of my young friends got a glass of cold water except me. I got a glass of warm water instead. I asked the waitress, “How come they get cold water while I got a glass of warm water?” She looked surprise and said, “I thought you wanted a glass of warm water”. Well, I certainly did not mention anything about warm water but apparently it was obvious to her by seeing a person with grey hair and looking much older would warrant a glass of warm water! What do you think the waitress did here? Well, she made an assumption. Of course, we just laughed it off but sometimes if the receiving person is sensitive, this may create an undesired confrontation. Therefore, to be safe, always ask!

Story No. 2: “Just a trim?”

When I was younger I used to go to the barber once every two weeks. Those were the days when I have really thick and black hair! The barber would often asked me whether I want the hair to be cut short or very short. The barber knew that I didn’t like to keep long hair. Well, times have certainly changed. Nowadays, I visit the barber once every two months. Yes, there is some money saving there but I don’t mind paying a bit more to return to the old days of long and thick hair (wishful thinking here!). My barber had since retired and returned to India. I would now go to one of those quick hair cut places.

When I stepped into the quick hair cut place, a young barber attended to me. I have not had my hair cut for more than two months (actually closer to three months). The young barber looked at me and said, “Just a trim, Sir?” I actually burst laughing and said, “Actually, I wanted you to cut it short but looking at things now, I think a trim will be fine”.  Can you see the difference between this story and the first story? The first story is about assumption while the second story is about facts. Yes, the second story is all about facts. The young barber didn’t need to make an assumption. The evidence is right in front of him to see. Therefore, he can safely say, “Just a trim, Sir” without offending the receiving party which was me.

Well, the stories above were written in good fun but it certainly gave me a new perspective of life. You see, we always assume we are still that young little boy or girl but in reality, all of us have grown, as all things in life should be. The person outside may see things differently from us but in reality, it brings you out of that fog and back into the real world!